Thursday, January 1, 2009

it's the end of the world as we know it (and I feel fine)

So, here it is: 2009. This will be a big year for me, what with becoming a married lady in May, graduating law school in that same month, moving to Chicago later in the summer to start a real lawyer-job, and hopefully buying a house (please financing, loosen up!) and turning 25 so's I can rent cars willy-nilly. Okay the last one's not so big. But I mean, I'm going to go from a student, living like a student, to a married lawyer (hopefully) homeowner. That's a big year.

Anyway, now a story about the end of 2008. My grandmother was reviewing our registry (our registry which I have slaved over and over and over) to decide what she would get for us, and she noticed we had registered for Calphalon knives (made in Japan). She seemed concerned, because she knew that German knives are the sort of industry standard, and she said she wanted to talk to my uncle who cooks a lot about it. She spoke to him and called me later to confirm that he said that German knives are really the way to go but then cautioned "I mean, I don't know. The Japanese really are always cutting things." (Her logic is unassailable.)

Anyway, after much research and stress, I have decided to change the registry and go with the German knives, in large part because the Japanese knives, while sharper and maintaining sharpness longer (good!) tend to rust if not washed and dried immediately after use. Several of the reviews I read mentioned that they had cut something, put the knife in the sink, and when they came back at the end of the meal to find their expensive Japanese knife rusted. Not cool. I mean, I can take care of nice things, but seriously, that's just too much.

So as I'm doing this research I ask the Mister to help me look at knife reviews and he responds "I'm not sure I have any special insight here." Which I of course interpret as "I don't have access to special information, it's the same interwebs I would use. You should do all the research and plan the entire wedding all by yourself with no help from me or anyone even when it's something stupid and gender-neutral and I might actually care about, like knives." This led to a minor wedding-related breakdown where I admitted I'm just stressed out about this whole wedding. The Mister helpfully asked what I was stressed out about and I was able to make this list: (1) we have no officiant and no idea on how to find an officiant to do a civil ceremony other than the web, and some of their websites are ATROCIOUS. The Mister agreed this is a valid concern and offered to help me do some research and to make time to go back to Wedding City for us to meet with candidates some time soon. (2) I have no vision for how to decorate the area where we're having both the ceremony and reception. It's a brick patio with a white tent to one side, and it's lovely on its own and we'll have floral centerpieces on the tables, so that's the most of it. Still I feel like I should figure out how to arrange the cake table and where to put the guestbook and whether we should do some kind of pretty lighting (I love those globe paper lanterns) and if we should do an "heirloom table" with pictures of our grandparents on their wedding days and if we need a big floral arrangement with the place cards and if we should do placecards at all our a big seating chart and.... The Mister's response to this concern was basically "wait, didn't we pick this location because it's pretty?" "Yes." "So...isn't it just going to be pretty?" (3) Have we made a huge mistake with the registry? I never would have second guessed our knife choice if my grandmother hadn't mentioned it to us, and then we would have ended up with a bunch of rust balls with very expensive and aesthetically pleasing hilts because that's all I looked at. What if the same thing is true of our plates? Or our food processor? OR ALL OF IT WHAT IF WE DID IT WRONG, ALL WRONG?! The mister's response to this concern was basically "well yeah, but at least we'll be married people with rust balls." Damn him and his level head.

So, now, in the spirit of this day, a few resolutions...

Wedding related resolutions:
1. I will remember the purpose of the day--to have a sweet fucking party for all our friends and family--and not inflate its importance. We're practically married already and we'll be actually married afterward regardless. The rest is gravy.
2. I will ask for help when I need it, specifically from the Mister.
3. I will not let the other pretty blogs and other crazy brides on the Knot freak me out. It is my wedding, it is not a competition.

Non-wedding related resolutions:
1. I will value my health, meaning I will eat mindfully and exercise. I will consider this an investment in my health rather than a means to weight-loss.
2. I will appreciate being a student while it lasts, even if I do hate law school. I will enjoy having so much free time and flexibility in my schedule because it will soon be over.
3. I will do a better job of showing the people in my life how much I love them and how important they are to me.
4. I will not bring "throwaway" items into my house. I will stop buying cheap crap which I will just have to replace soon anyway and instead save up to buy something more worthwhile, substantial, and lasting.