Saturday, October 25, 2008

here comes the bride...ALONE!

So, as I mentioned, I've decided to walk down the aisle alone despite the fact that I love and am pretty close to both my parents. People seem to be very emotional about this choice, which is a little funny to me. One of the reasons I didn't really think I would get married is sort of what the whole institution used to mean, and the relics of that that continue into today. I knew I didn't want anyone "giving me away" because, you know, I'm not a cow, I don't belong to my father (or my mother) and I'm not theirs to give. I am my own woman, and I am giving myself to the Mister just as he's giving himself to me. What better way to symbolize that I am independent, and that I am coming into this of my own choice, with my own mind, my own heart? What better way to symbolize that, at its root, this is about ME and HIM?

I knew I needed to talk to my dad about this before we got too close to the wedding day because I really didn't want to hurt him. Like I said, this is about me, and not about my relationship with him. So I was at lunch with my dad and my sister (and maid of honor) and I mentioned my feelings on the matter, and my dad was totally cool about it. "Yeah, that makes sense. That's a lot more YOU." (Which is accurate.) My sister, however, FLIPPED HER SHIT. She thinks it makes it look like I don't get along with dad, or that I don't have family. She thinks it's a slap in the face to him. To which I can only say: um...no?

I certainly don't mean to say that it's anti-feminist to be walked down the aisle by your dad. If that's what the bride wants, more power to her. But for me, with my already having some icky feelings about weddings, this was a nice compromise. And my dad will still get a sweet boutineer and a hug. What more could a guy want, right?