on and on and on

So, I sort of apologize for my lack of regular posting. I only sort of apologize because I've entered what The Mister refers to as "finals freak out mode" and what could be referred to as "wedding freak out mode" and thus, this blog isn't exactly high on my priority list. Sorry, suckers.

The poll on my sailor's mouth has closed. The vote was 10-1 in favor of "Who gives a shit?" and as it turns out, the 1 "My sensitive ears!" vote was by my bridesmaid who-direct quote here- "thought it was funny." So apparently no one is offended and I will continue to curse with abandon.

My shower was this weekend. It was lovely. Lots of people came who I thought wouldn't, and a few people didn't who I thought would. I guess that's how it always goes. I was so happy to see everyone that I almost didn't notice how exhausting it is to be the center of attention all that time. But seriously, it was very touching to me how many great women there are in my life and how they all are so excited about my marrying The Mister.

We also met with the caterer, the location lady, and the wedding planner. There was a lot of "what should we do about x?" followed by the three of them discussing, turning to me and the Mister for a response and us saying something like "uuuh...whatever you think?" and their agreeing that that whatever they decided what the right choice. In short: exactly what we needed. I was sort of feeling silly about hiring a wedding planner given that a lot of the stuff I did on my own, but I will say in that hour she more than made it all worth it.

I also had my second (and final!) dress fitting. It turns out my shoulders are uneven. So that's good to know, in case I ever wanted to be self-conscious about something new.

P.S. Has anyone seen a guestbook idea that they love? And that wouldn't be ridiculously pricey? Your help is much appreciated.

soon as I settle, I better be able to move on

So this weekend, the Mister and I headed back to the city where we're getting married for wall-to-wall wedding action. It was so exhausting that, even though it's well after noon, I'm still laying in my pajamas in my bed.

First, we met with a possible officiant. This woman was, how shall I say, weird. She seemed perfectly nice, but she also is clearly a crazy cat lady, you know? I also don't know how the hell we could find someone else at this point, and I feel confident that if we scripted everything out she'd do it just how we want, so how much does it matter? The Mister and I both left sort of feeling blah--we'd hoped that we'd have some sort of "connection" for lack of a better word (and for the infection of Rock of Love into my brain) and we didn't. We're up against the wall as far as time and distance, so we'll probably just hire her. Settle number one.

Second, we had our first caterer's tasting. The food was delicious, so I am quite pleased. But we had asked last-minute to change the potatoes, and that wasn't reflected (though the old-style potatoes were pretty good). Also, we didn't get to taste the bread or the appetizers. Whatever, I'm settling.

Third, I had my first dress fitting. The alterations man (seamster?) is fantastic. He clearly knows what he's doing, but he also just just fun and entertaining. Also, I've been working out a lot and eating reasonably well (until this weekend, where I was sick and back home---so of course I couldn't work out or eat anything except the MOST disgusting foods imaginable) so the dress fits SO much better than it did last time I tried it on, before Thanksgiving. So that went well, until he started pinning my bustle. My dress has a fair amount of stuff going on, and it turns out, when you want that stuff to not be on the floor, it looks slightly odd. As in, WOW, that's a lot of fabric. On my ass. Awesome. He tried a couple different things, but you know, there's only so much you can do. It looks like you're hiking your dress up because YOU'RE HIKING YOUR DRESS UP. Sigh. Settle number three.

Fourth, we went to the tux place. Here, we did not settle. (I need to put in a plug here for family-owned and operated businesses. We ended up going to two locations of the same store and being waiting on two different guys whose names were on the door and nowhere else in the wedding industry have I been so well-taken care of.) In fact, the Mister ended up getting such a good deal on a tux, he bought one (or should I say, his mother bought it for him. I think she was just so pleased to be invited along, she started dropping plastic). And let me tell you, if you have never seen the very tall, very dashing, freckle-faced young Aryan man you love in a tuxedo, you are missing out on one of the great pleasures in life. I know he felt a little silly, what with his mom and me watching him, but man...ladies go crazy for a sharp-dressed man.

Finally, I had hoped to meet up with the invitations lady. It didn't happen. I wanted to go to a paper store with her because we're still having what I will term "communications issues" about what emerald green means. Since last time we talked about paper it took me 2 months to see anything, and the invites need to go out in three weeks, I decided--you guessed it--to settle for a color that wasn't quite right. I emailed the inivitations lady to tell her as much, and she says that she got some more samples and is sending them to me today. Fingers crossed this means that my custom invites are actually...you know, what I wanted.

I must say, I am really looking forward to the day when we can go home...just to go home. (AND WHEN WE DO, WE'LL BE TOTALLY MARRIED. Weird.)

guess what I'm wearing right now?

If you guessed lingerie, you're not only creepy, but you don't know me that well! If you guessed a veil, you're not only creepy, but right!

I was talking to my alterations man, and he said I should bring my veil with me, which reminded me that I hadn't yet bought one. I knew I wanted one, but just hadn't gotten around to buying one...the ones in bridal stores are so crazy-expensive! I finally just decided to go on and buy a cheapie. Less than $10 on eBay! (Also, my first eBay purchase ever. Yes really. I know, I'm living in like 1996.) It's a little fuller than I had anticipated at the crown, but I think once I get it situated and I'm wearing it with something other than an H&M sweater and jeans (you know, like a white gown) it's going to be awesome.

I LOVE the look of birdcage veils...on other brides. For some reason, I just look like a little girl playing dress up or something. Plus, I'm not entirely convinced it would look right with my dress, which is more Gatsby-era than Garbo-era vintage looking, I think. Plus, there's something sort of ethereally pretty about a traditional lighter-than-air veil. Or at least I think so. As I sit here, blogging and wearing it. That's not weird, right?

what's done is done

So after much back and forth, I decided to show my mom the dress I showed you all a few days ago. My sister/MOH was mildly horrified that that wasn't step one. Here's why it wasn't step one: I showed it to her, and literally within 30 seconds she had ordered it. I wanted to be sure.

Thanks to all of you for reassuring me that we can make it look more happily festive with colorful accessories. (I also think the tea length and poofiness help.) Special thanks to Melissa for telling me how to, you know, be a real blogger and add a gadget. Next time. Next time.

And because I forgot to credit the photo last time, here's a link to where you too, can be the owner of said dress.

what is this, a funeral?

I wish I knew how to post a poll, because this a poll post. The question is, the mother of the bride wearing black: no big deal or kinda funereal? Specifically, what do we think of this dress--



Let me know in the comments. Please.

and another thing

I guess I did have a lot of wedding-related crap to post about. Hmm. Who knew.

Anyway, I tried on the dress again at my mom's place over the holiday. It's a lot of dress, which is still a concern for me. But it is a gorgeous lot of dress. It's a little snug and so it pulls a bit in the midsection, so that's problematic, but I think it's totally fixable with an actual commitment to working out or the magic of Tony, my alterations guy. (My lazy self says the latter is more likely.) Of course, even having seen it recently I was still shopping on www.oncewed.com this morning. It's like an illness.

The Running of the Brides

So I've mentioned The Running of the Brides here a couple of times here. Or at least once. It feels like more, but I can't find the others to link to them. Whatevs. Anyway, I feel I owe it to you, my loyal band of two readers who weren't there with me, to describe the experience. And, dear readers, it was an experience.

So once a year, Filene's pushes all their regular merchandise to the side and brings in racks and racks full of wedding gowns which were discontinued or otherwise cast off by the bridal salons of the world. The doors open at 8, I think, but brides camp out the night before, waiting in line to get first crack. When the doors open, the women (in "teams," normally designated by hats or t-shirts or some such) run in a frenzy to grab as many dresses as possible. The dresses are not sorted by size or style, so this means they have a ton of dresses, most of which won't work. They then trade their cast-off dresses for other teams cast-offs, trying to get things which fit their needs. Some carry signs like "I NEED A WHITE, STRAPLESS SIZE 2." There are no fitting rooms to be had, so the brides are wearing bike shorts and sports bras, and changing in the aisles, with bridesmaids holding up full length mirrors and saying things like "I don't know, it's a little frumpy."

If you hadn't guessed by now, this is not exactly my style.

So, my bridesmaids and I roll in at about 10. 10 seemed right--the real crazies have either found their dresses and left or given up and left. Either way, they're gone. It also means that the dresses aren't so picked over that there's nothing left. Don't get me wrong though--there are a lot of FUGLY dresses. (The Mullet Dress comes to mind.) There were also a lot of brown dresses. I mean, there's ivory, but these dresses were past tan into straight up brown. And, of course, there were the '80s poufy dresses. But in the midst of all of that were some really gorgeous dresses. Including mine.

I think most brides second guess their dress choices at some point, particularly if they (like me) look at all these websites with other brides wearing such breathtaking dresses. I have had this problem exacerbated by the fact that my dress has been stored at my mom's place and I haven't seen it or tried it on in six months. Though maybe that's better? Anyway, sometimes I wonder if I missed out by skipping the bridal boutique experience, but I'm sure I would have fallen in love with an $8,000 gown. Ah, well. That's the way it goes I guess.

party in the front, business in the back

So my two bridesmaids and I bought my wedding dress at The Running of the Brides. One of these days I should do a whole post about that, because it was a sight to behold. One of the best/worst things about the experience is that there are a lot of really fugly dresses out there, and The Running is where they go to die. Or, more accurately, where they go to get bought by totally desparate bargain hunters. One such dress we affectionately named The Mullet. It was a sparkly, ridiculous confection in and of itself, but then--never wanting to leave too much without more--the front was short and the back was long. My bridesmaids insisted I try this travesty on. The front was seriously indecently short. Well above mid-thigh. The back was so long it had to have been a chapel-length train. WHY?! WHY?! I am not judgy about bridal fashion, for the most part. I mean, do what you want, whatever makes you feel pretty. But really? What you want to be wearing on the most-photographed day of your life is a mullet dress? Interesting choice. I figured the inherent ridiculousness of this garment was why it had landed at The Running. I figured no self-respecting woman would actually wear such a thing. (I should have been disabused of this notion when, as I was trying it on, several people told me how great it looked.)

I shall now post a photo of a totally different mullet gown. And a real person wearing it. I feel a little bad about doing this, but come on. You need to see this. This person is an acquiantance of my sister's, who sent it on to me. For which I can only say: THANK YOU FOR KNOWING ME SO WELL.

Shoe Update

They are here, and they are even more lovely in person. They are slightly too small, however, and Bluefly does not have them a half size up. They're so completely perfect in every other way, however, that I've decided to keep them. I'm working on stretching them out/breaking them in starting...yesterday.

Also, they SO need some kind of "shoe bling" so if you've got suggestions, leave 'em in the comments. Please. And thank you.